The following has been contributed by Gregg Thompson and Susanne Biro . They frame together this interesting idea in their book “Unleashed! Expecting Greatness and Other Secrets to coaching for Exceptional Performance”:

Dangerous Conversations

How often do you engage in the kind of conversation that stimulates changes in performance? Reflect on the few significant conversations you had over the last week and consider the following:

– At the end of the conversation did you feel complete

– did you say everything you needed to say to that person at that time? – Do you feel good about the interaction? If so, notice why. If not, consider why not.

– Notice if there was something else you wish you had said or done. For example, do you feel that you held back in the conversation? If so, in what ways and why?

Leaders at all organizational levels are being asked to be more coach-like with their team members, colleagues, and even their customers. Unfortunately, many of us who lead organizations find ourselves ill-equipped to provide such coaching.

It’s not that we lack the requisite interpersonal and leadership competencies, but that coaching requires more. It requires us to engage in the “Dangerous Conversations – dangerous because the conversation confronts the questions that need to be asked and the issues that make even the best of us uncomfortable. (Incidentally, we are equally uncomfortable confronting the good stuff as we are in confronting the bad.) Walk Away Empty When we engage in the Dangerous Conversation we walk away empty; everything that needed to be addressed was said in the moment, to the person with whom it needed to be said. Sometimes this requires us to recognize the exceptional work of a colleague, other times it may require us to share our deep concerns with our boss and his performance. Either way, if we share our real thoughts, we can take comfort in knowing we respected the other enough to tell him the truth; we cared enough about his success to take the risk and to be uncomfortable for his benefit.

To learn more, and to obtain a complimentary copy of the Unleashed! e-book, please visit: Unleashed! Expecting Greatness and Other Secrets of Coaching for Exceptional Performance.